Guess Who?

17 Feb 2017

Consider how this notable presidential candidate was described:

  • Autocratic
  • Symptoms of “preposterous megalomania” (362)
  • Tendency to inflate numbers (363)
  • Talks incessantly about himself, what he has done and could do more than other mortals (340)
  • Authoritarian – “a man with absolute dominion over his people who brooks no advice that does not further his own daydreams and grinds out policies solely in the grist-mill of his own ambition” (354-55)
  • Will be…“A president of the United States, not a ‘party’ president, but a president of the whole people” (364)
  • Does not allow criticisms, even by his associates and “contradictions rouse in him the lion”; threatens to trample down enemies (355, 420)
  • Needs to confabulate stories — that is, make up stories out of whole cloth — but present them as real. Seems to be “formally” aware that claims are false but has overall impaired sense of reality (418)
  • Empire builder, real estate magnate, financial and land speculator — builder of temples, cities and kingdoms — but mostly “a constructor of continuing fantasy” (421)
  • Tremendous ability to gain free publicity (viii)
  • Known as an inveterate woman-chaser with multiple marriages
  • Unscientific racial theories (415, 423)

Have you guessed yet?

Here are a few more traits commonly ascribed to this public figure.

  • Habit of loose and wild utterances (420)
  • Destruction of media he regards as unfavorable (377)
  • Exuberant talent for improvisation with lack of care for consistency of detail (403, 409)
  • Personality traits of “jollity, love of sport and good living” (402)
  • “Impostor” personality with “omnipotence fantasy” (418)
  • Prodigious personal charm (402)
  • Nimble in explaining and extricating himself from failure (417)
  • Presidential campaign theme: “American liberty is on the wane and calamity is about to destroy the peace of the people”; “too much government” (341)
  • Good showman, absolutely dependent on having an audience (418)
  • Identification of God with material prosperity (402)

If you’re thinking “Dtrump-nose-cronald J. Trump” you wouldn’t necessarily be wrong, but the actual figure in question is Joseph Smith, founder of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (the Mormon Churchjoseph-smith-profile-2-rotate).

Smith started out as a gold-digger (literally) and treasure-hunting entrepreneur in his teens in Vermont and western New York in the 1820s; proclaimed a revelation from the Angel Moroni which resulted in the Book of Mormon; and journeyed westward where he founded businesses, cities, temples and got involved in numerous lawsuits involving his various properties and management practices.

Illustration of the murder of Joseph Smith (1805-1844), founder of the Mormon Church, along with his brother Hyrum. (Photo by Time Life Pictures/Mansell/Time Life Pictures/Getty Images)

Illustration of the murder of Joseph Smith (1805-1844), founder of the Mormon Church, along with his brother Hyrum. (Photo by Time Life Pictures/Mansell/Time Life Pictures/Getty Images)

He actually did run for president of the U.S. in 1844 but ultimately died in July of that year trying to flee a murderous mob at the jail where he was imprisoned following his orders to his legion to destroy an anti-Mormon newspaper office that he considered “libelous.”

Smith clearly wanted complete control about what was said about him and his movement and his group’s destruction of the Nauvoo Expositor was described as the act of “an autocrat who could think only in terms of suppression.” (377).

Obviously I have structured the list above craftily to bring out the most obvious and egregious similarities between Smith and Trump.

But let’s just take one item, “confabulation,” to get a better understanding of how autocrats feel they can simply “make stuff up” without consequences.

Joseph Smith, not realizing that the mystery of Egyptian hieroglyphics would soon be revealed in America, came across some genuine Egyptian papyri in 1835 and, perhaps feeling the spirit of God once again descending on the same self-taught linguistic talents that produced the Book of Mormon, proclaimed that he had translated the papyri. The scrolls were, he declared, the writings of Abraham and Joseph (son of Jacob). Of course this was eventually exposed by scholars as pure confabulation.

(click on pic to enlarge)book-of-abraham-facsimile-compare

Likewise, Donald Trump confabulated, that is, simply imagined, at 9/11 that “thousands and thousands of people in New Jersey were cheering as that building was coming down. Thousands of people were cheering.” He says he saw it on TV despite no external evidence of such coverage or cheering. Anywhere. (See Trump Needs Apprentice for Fact-Checking)

He also claimed that the U.S. unemployment rate could be as high as 42 percent. And of course there’s the whopper that he had handpicked instructors for his dubious Trump “University.”

Earlier this year Trump said that there were 1.5 million people at his inauguration. “I’m like, wait a minute. I made a speech. I looked out, the field was, it looked like a million, million and a half people.” Confabulator extraordinaire!

Most recently, Trump claimed that his electoral college win was the biggest since Reagan. Confabulation elite status.

And of course there’s the on-again-off-again bromance with Russia’s Vladimir Putin. Trump most recently boldly claimed that he has never met him, has no relationship: “I don’t know Putin, have no deals in Russia, and the haters are going crazy.”

Yet in a newly resurfaced 2015 interview with conservative talk radio host Michael Savage, Trump claimed that he met Putin and that they “got along great,” contradicting his later campaign trail claims that he never met or spoke with Putin.

The Washington Post has a very helpful chronology of the bromance, including this exchange:

TRUMP: I have no relationship with Putin. I don’t think I’ve ever met him. I never met him. I don’t think I’ve ever met him.

STEPHANOPOULOS: You would know it if you did.

TRUMP: I think so.

It would be fascinating to book a trip in the Wayback Machine to bring Mr. Smith to Washington and put the Mormon up against the Trumpon.

Would they be like old fishing buddies spinning tall tales of giant marlins caught and thrown back? Or would they just glare at each other as poseurs to the title of Confabulator-in-Chief? Would Trump immediately nominate Smith to the new Cabinet post of Secretary of Religion? Would Joe offer advice on how to build a real temple?

My guess is that they would immediately set to work on a new self-absorbent prophetic novel: The Book of Trumpon.

book-of-trumpon-cover-2-emboss


Much of this information, including quotes,  is derived from Fawn Brodie’s excellent biography of Joseph Smith, No Man Knows My History: the Life of Joseph Smith.  (2nd edition, 1971). All page numbers refer to this edition.
Other sources include The Book of Mormon (1963 edition); Harry L. Rapp’s The Mormon Papers (1978); Joseph Smith, by C. Clark Julius, The Philalethes (August 1987); “Plural Marriage in Kirtland and Nauvoo,” (LDS.org), “Testimonies of Abigail Harris and Lucy Harris,” Palmyra, NY (1833); “People of State of New York vs. Joseph Smith,” Bainbridge, New York, March 20, 1826 (sworn statements accusing Smith of being an impostor and “disorderly person” (aka “juggler”) who deceived the public by looking in a stone placed in his hat to find buried treasures.); “Review of Book of Mormon,” unpublished, Veihdeffer, 2016, 14pp.
Trump nose courtesy of photoshop. (See “Trump Needs Apprentice for Fact Checking”)
Book of Trumpon cover by the author, adapted from his copy of the Book of Mormon

Trump Needs Apprentice…for Fact Checking

Pinnochio-walk-Quintus4

Did “thousands and thousands of people in New Jersey cheer” after the September 11, 2001 attacks?

All reporter-mocking aside (“Now the poor guy . . . you gotta see this guy”), Donald Trump’s story of “thousands cheering” in New Jersey is taking on the proportions of an epic fairy tale that he can’t get out of. So in typical Trump fashion, he simply doubles down on his fantasy — “demanding an apology from anyone who called him wrong.”

The Donald-In-Wonderland fantasy vision goes like this

“I watched in Jersey City New Jersey where thousands and thousands of people were cheering as that building was coming down. Thousands of people were cheering.”

So, he either saw it on TV or watched it personally from his Manhattan apartment where he said he was at the time. We’ll give him a pass for saying he watched in Jersey City as simply “Trump Grammar.”

“There were people that were cheering on the other side of New Jersey, where you have large Arab populations”

Maybe, as a Manhattanite, he considers Palestine to be “the other side of New Jersey.”

“They were cheering as the World Trade Center came down”

But although there were “reports,” they were regarded at the time as unfounded rumors that were never corroborated, some spawned by chain emails and comments from shock jock Howard Stern’s radio show, according to PolitiFact.

Politifact quotes a Sept. 18, 2001 Washington Post article which said:

“Law enforcement authorities detained and questioned a number of people who were allegedly seen celebrating the attacks and holding tailgate-style parties on rooftops while they watched the devastation on the other side of the river.”

One can only wonder how people can “tailgate” on a roof.

In any event, Politifact continues that there is “no evidence that any of these allegations ever stuck.”

So let’s try unpacking the various ludicrous elements of the Trump Tale.

1. Watched on TV – “It was on television, I saw it. It was well covered”

Should there not be some video record of it? Somewhere? I realize this was before the widespread uPinnochio-nosegrowingse of cellphone cams but certainly there would be a TV station coming forth with a record of this.

Update: MTV believes they have uncovered what may have been Trump’s video fantasy.1

2. “thousands and thousands” vs “a number of people.

Now that’s a big difference, like the difference between driving down a road at 200 mph and 5 mph. Or, as the students might say, between a “rager” and “chillin‘”.

3. Alleged but never sustained.

Anyone can say anything happened. The crucial 2001 story by the aforementioned former Washington Post reporter Serge Kovaleski that Trump relies on for his validation very clearly uses the phrase “were allegedly seen.”

4. No police reports.

Despite media reports of police inquiries, there is no evidence of actual celebrations or that any investigations resulted in any convictions.

So, assuming that the Jersey police were not in league with Arabs or 9/11 perps and thus might be inclined to cover up, one would expect to see some sort of police record validating the Trumpination.

Pinnochio-long nose gesture

5. “Where you have large Arab populations.”

Of course this sort of guilt-by-association is pointless. Having a large Arab population doesn’t mean the Arabs were doing the alleged celebrating. However, Trump makes it perfectly clear: …a heavy Arab population that were cheering as the buildings came down.” (From the George Stephanopoulos interview on ABC’s This Week program)

6. “cheering”

Anyone who has seen a crowd of thousands (or a classroom of students) reacting to some surprising news knows that cheering and astonishment can be confusing to an onlooker. If there was any demonstration of emotion going on at the alleged rooftop tailgate-style parties, it’s possible that the rooftoppers were expressing dismay. Unless you can actually hear them yelling “hooray” or mom-taaz!, [ممتاز] how can you really be sure that they weren’t crying out in horror?

Trump-nosework

7. Wait a minute…it was 8:45 a.m., and you say “tailgate-style parties” were observed?

P.S.

The award for the most mealy-mouthed response to Trump’s charge of celebrations has to go to candidate Gov. Chris Christie of New Jersey, as reported in BuzzFeed News:

“I do not remember that. And so, it’s not something that was part of my recollection. I think if it happened I would remember it. But, you know, there could be some things I forget, too. I don’t remember that.”


1…or a video, of a group of rowdy kids — “probably about a dozen or so kids between the ages of 12 and 13” — banging on a trash can after 9/11. The high school senior interviewed at the time did not mention the peoples’ race nor their religion. She says that what she “saw that night [was] not anything any different than would’ve happened on any other summer night, on any other day where school was let out early.”
 Sources
POLITIFACT: Fact-checking Trump’s claim that thousands in New Jersey cheered when World Trade Center tumbled  by Lauren Carroll November 22, 2015
BuzzFeed News: Trump Says Falsely That New Jersey Arabs “Cheered” On 9/11 
ABC News: Stephanopoulis interview
MTV News: “Trump Is Wrong…We Dug Up the Video” 
Trump’s enhanced schnoz created by the author